Rambling

hhmm... there are so many things i wanted to write,
the words are actually already lingering in my head,
but i was just lazy enough to start typing...

i'll put it here one by one sometimes
whenever i get a chance ...

Soo this is my FlashBack of 2009 as i can remember it  ...

i think better if i ramble about what's NOT exactly my favorite Cup of Tea first,

later on i will share the good cup of Tea even with the Milk and the Whip cream on it ...

Entering the Latest Month of the 2009,
I actually had the feeling of somewhat frustration,,,
wasn't soo sure either what caused it...
.... hhmm... stop!!! hold on there !!!...oh, i just lie, don't i ??...
i know exactly what cause of the frustration is...

As much as i have loved & still in love in korea thingy
and as much as i love my practically New Real Korean environment,
i started to learn and get some ideas bout them,
I guess Life is like that,
when we only know the outside of it, everything seems wonderfully nice and good,
but when we entered bit by bit , step by step further more toward the inside of the arena, that's when we face the real situation,

the first disappointment came to me...
the first then continued the second then again...
wuih... wuih... then it become frustration...
although i also admit it wasn't all bad,
just something didn't click the way i wanted to be..
or the way i liked it to be...

I just realized this part of life where i am in at the moment,
it's not in some kind of korean dramas nor korean movies,
it's the real life with the real people
and bunch of same nationality people of course who acted like an assholes,
it's the real life with the real korean culture,
with the real korean ways of thinking...

I learned something bout them,
which honestly made me feel uncomfortable
esp for some special reason,

@@ - golden quietness toward something >>> it makes me think that quiet is not golden anymore...
@@ - no decision making toward something >>> in my eyes it just makes me feel terribly frustrated ... all in my mind was just "why" and "how come" over and over again ... huh!
@@ - equal treatment toward everybody no matter how the person is >>> believe it or not, i just experienced this thing, this kind of thing also bundled up making me feeling unappreciated ...

ahhhh... i was soo overly sensitive and over-reacted...

But since this is my blog and my talking space, so i can say whatever i want in here too...

This kind of uncertainty >> that's what i don't like...
Come to think of it, the more i thought bout it, the more i realize that:
who cares what i don't like...

My position is only 2 ways:
just follow the way or get out of their way, isn't it...
i am not in any position to ask for change,
i am the one who has to obey ...
so this is me till the present time, trying hard not too think about this any further and just walking in that one line ...

this was the hardest stage, but now i am getting used to it...
i supposed i can live with it for now...

THE STORY WASN'T ALL BAD,
THE REST WAS ACTUALLY UNBELIEVABLY NICE AS WELL...

AND THE STORY CONTINUES...
This is why the title is rambling,
becoz unless you're in my position,
you don't know what this is all about...